"50 shades"

I just marathon'd the Twilight movies last week. Let's discuss this.

EDIT: Ok, more specifically, let's discuss that elaborate forest montage where Taylor Lautner's face falls in love with a barely-day-old infant.

Sad to say but I do know what you are talking about. So, your thoughts?

You gotta admit, the fucking action scenes are pretty amazing in the Twilight series. I mean the baseball game was what made me wanna watch the rest of them. And the ending scene that never happened was awesome. I don't remember anything from the other two movies, except for the wedding I think, because my roommate was making out with his girlfriend like half a metre away from me and I was all like "oh my god this is so beautiful, oh god look at her dress, oh my good they look so good together i'm gonna cry, i can't believe this moment has finally come" and so on in an old lady voice.

Literally the only scene of those movies I've seen was Kristen Stewart tackling a cougar, which I have to admit was pretty funny.

Man, those action scenes... I don't like the effect they used to show quickness, but yeah, they were cool.

I knew fully well what I was getting myself into (aside from the wolf stuff), so those lowered expectations really helped me enjoy it for what it was. I really like the psychic girl, and even though she got a lot of screen time, I wish she got more.

@Tawg: I have to rewatch that scene to give you a proper analysis (because the first time, I was too busy covering my eyes and going "IS THIS MOTHERFUCKER IMPRINTING ON A BABY" to pay attention to the actual scene), but for now, I'll just say that it's one of the highlights of my summer.

Edit: Wait, that's probably the best analysis I can give you.

They should do a spin-off set ten years later, where it's just Kristen Stewart's character hunting/killing/beating the shit out of cougars. It should turn out that cougars were genetically bred by aliens to hunt vampires thousands of years before. They nearly succeeded back in the stone age... AND NOW THEY'RE BACK TO FINISH THE JOB.

As I have nothing constructive to say about twilight, I shall not comment on it and instead talk to Tawg about the Hobbit.

@Tawg: I saw the teaser trailer for the third film, and I am sorely disappointed by what PJ is doing to the defining moment of the Hobbit Trilogy. The Battle of Five Armies was supposed to be out in the open, at the foot of the Lonely mountain, now it is a fucking ruined city? I get that the city was nearby, but it was in no means a part of the battle in the book, and I resent the hell out of its inclusion in the film. Also I am not sure about how I feel with the Dwarves riding goats, it seems right and wrong all at the same time.

Not to intrude on your conversation, but don't you think the damage is already done in that regard? The book was a couple hundred pages, and they've stretched it out to a trilogy of 3-hour long movies. Christ, I've never seen so little happen for such a long time.

If they made the Hobbit into one movie, it would have been complete shit, there is just too much to cover unless they made one ridiculously long movie. Plenty of stuff happens, just not as many fight scenes as Lotr. I completely and fully realize they could have done way better, but I still love the movies, but fucks sake it is the Battle of the Five Armies, it is possibly the most iconic battle in Middle-earth and it is going to be all kinds of fucked up.

I dunno, man... An awful lot of the stuff with Legolas seemed like filler...

Keep in mind that for each movie 30 minutes of run time is devoted entirely to the credits.

Very true Tawg, and I never said I liked Legolas's filler scenes, though Bolg beat him pretty good which was fun to see XD

I think the entire Hobbit trilogy has very little merit.

Want to know my favorite scene? It's this one:



If you've read the Silarmillion you will know who Feanor is. He's an elf who made the Silmaril, 3 indescribably beautiful gems which captured the Essence of the world before it became flawed. They are basically the reason everything happened in the first age of middle earth.

So pretty fucking important. The inspiration for these Jewels is Galadriel's hair.

Feanor begged her 3 times for a single strand of her hair and she refused him 3 times, She knew he was full of greed and power lust so she refused. Gimli was also struck by her beauty and asked the same request, a single strand of her hair to remember her beauty by. And she gave him 3.

3.

And that's why Gimli gets to be an elf friend, Because Galadriel gave him a gift that she refused to the greatest elf who ever lived. She knows that he doesn't understand the value of what she gave him, But he will treasure it anyway. Legolas understands this, He knows the backstory. You can almost imagine in that moment he reconsiders his prejudices.

Nothing in those three shit stained CGI overusing poorly written crap fests can compare to the subtlety of the LOTR trilogy. It makes me feel upset when people defend them, Simply because the subtletys of the Lord of the rings books/movie are lost on them.

Fuck.

Edit: "If you made the hobbit into one movie then it would be terrible because there is so much to cover"

Do you know how much they cut out of LOTR? Do you understand how much of the book actually isn't in the movies?

The Hobbit could have been one great movie and be done with it. I'm actually insulted that you try to justify the insult to Tolkein to be the setting of a battle rather than the bastardization and commercialization of a beloved story.

Edit Edit: Fuck

That shit with the barrels going down the river... Jesus, it was like watching someone else play a mediocre video game.

FUCK.

I mean come on that's filler, That scene could have been 30 seconds long.

Fuck.

DD get on skype im mad.

Can you stop being on topic already.

Jesus just, Fuck.

I'm amazed.

^ You on tonight?

Sure just tell me what time you'll be on.

Anyway to stay on topic: The Hobbit was terrible.

Fuck.

Well I like it. It helps to not give a fuck about the original source material.