-Bloo-,
Yautja,
11 years ago
My town's water supply was randomly contaminated today due to something I'm sure must have been a plot to initiate a zombie apocalypse.
Day 1 - 6:06pm - Tuesday, October 15, 2013
Dear Diary,
The water is bad. It's probably not Zombie Armageddon, but I'm drinking Mountain Dews to shrink my balls so that they don't flap when I'm running the fuck away from everyone.
This is a hunting town, which means there is at least a hunting rifle and/or a harpoon at every other house. But that means there's also food stores, because people like to eat.
Edit:
Day 1 - 6:30pm - Tuesday, October 15, 2013
Dear Diary,
Apparently Mountain Dew doesn't shrink your balls. It looks like I'm gonna have to chop them off. Wish me luck.